06 May 2012


It's been over two months since my last post.  In my drafts folder there are about 15 started posts that I never finished.  Messages that I started but that I couldn't wrap up.  Thoughts in my head that I couldn't put into words.  Feelings in my heart that I wasn't sure how to express.  Usually it's writing that helps me sort everything out and put questions into perspective but there has just been something blocking me.  I've been running here and there but haven't put myself fully into that either.  But it's spring and it's time for re-birth and starting again and I'm just going to leave all the half-written musings in the drafts folder and begin again. 

This weekend was the Kalamazoo Marathon, at which I ran the 1/2.  I didn't train nearly enough.  My IT band was still acting up.  But I couldn't not run.  It wasn't pretty.  It's the first time I wanted to walk off a course because I was hurting but I knew it was the kind of pain that I could stretch out and run through so I kept going.  By the time I got to mile 6 I was laying in the grass doing Pigeon attempting to stretch out my hip.  I laid there and remembered that this is JUST 13.1 miles.  My little fighter Emma didn't want to get spinal taps and 'picks' but she did it.  She kept fighting.  Steve was in turmoil his last few weeks and in total pain and yet he kept smiling.  When it got tough, I asked Steve to run with me.  And we did it.  There were tears at the end (as always!) and I got a new personal best of 2hrs 14 min. 

I ran this race with my girl Danah, who constantly reminds me that people come in to your life for a reason.  We have supported each other through our divorces and into new birth as single women.  The race is most certainly not only to the swift, but to those who keep on running.  Life may not always be easy.  The finish line may feel a million miles away.  There may be challenges that seem to test your faith, your tenacity and your strength but keep going.  Keep writing, even if you don't finish the story.  Keep running, even when you want to give up.  And keep smiling, even if you are super sweaty!! 
So, time to keep moving on.  As much as these past two months have been crazy and busy and challenging, I know I have to just keep moving and I'll get where I need to go. 

1 comment:

  1. Congrats again my dear sister!! Seeing your beautiful smile made my eyes tear up. I miss u so much!!! Xoxoxo. Kaisa