25 August 2013

Sometimes it amazes me just how quickly time can pass and how one season can be upon us and then ending with the blink of any eye.  Against I'm sure popular opinion, I anxiously anticipate the arrival of fall.  As much as I love the warmth and sunshine of summer, there is just something so quiet and cozy about the fall season.  Boots, blazers, jeans & scarves - not too hot but cool enough to bundle up a bit.  It means I can finally straighten my hair again.  I can walk to work without sweating off my makeup and overheating.  Long runs, the changing colours of the leaves, baking, sleeping with the windows open - the joys of fall are many and dear to me.  It's my birthday season.  It was my wedding anniversary. It's Thanksgiving and all things pumpkin.  It's the lovely time of planning for Christmas and my favourite holiday! There is still so much promise in the fall and yet also a time of wrapping up the year and reflection.  Looking at my vision board for 2013 I cringe at the fact that it's actually still incomplete but happy that I at least started it this year! It was to be the year of love - I haven't seemed to find that as of yet but there is still plenty of time! I have stayed as true as I can to living with positivity and optimism.  I find myself still learning new things about myself every day.  There has already been so many new things and milestones this year - new friends, new adventures, new hope.  I've had to learn to be the one left behind when someone else embarks on a voyage to find themselves.  There have been hard choices and times of contemplation.  There have been moments of closure and moments of things just beginning.  Looking at the words here, loving like you've never been hurt is probably one of the hardest things to truly do.  As much as you can convince yourself that it's time to open your heart again, there is the scarred part that, even though it has healed, is still trepidatious about letting someone in.  Sometimes you begin to see more clearly what others saw in your past relationships.  You realize that you do definitely deserve better and that perhaps cooking for one, although challenging, is exactly what you have needed.  Slowly you can learn to cook for others again and set the table for two.  Not being afraid is difficult but never living because of fear just seems so wrong.  So take chances.  Accept change in stride.  Look both inside yourself and at who surrounds you. Know that time does heal a broken heart and those hearts learn to love again one day.  Seasons will continue to change and time will likely fly by even faster so find blessings in each day.  Say I love you when you feel it.  Let your heart be loved if someone is willing and trust that not everyone will hurt you.  Believe in miracles.  Be the person you want people to remember you for.  Go out on a limb. Love. Live.